God heal the hurt...............


                You know life has a funny way of turning on you in a blink of an eye.I went from having My parents around Everyone laughing and carrying on..And three Sisters who were my world.To losing them all in ten years,Gone are the fun filled holidays,With the kids running up and down the hallway,Watching them hyped up on sugar,Sometimes the house was so crowed we sat on the floor.Dad always had a pot a coffee on.And life was hectic& fast,,but good,Sometimes all we  had was a pot of beans and corn bread that  Mom would make for everyone.

                                   Now its just me and my little dog Nuggett .A different house.No noise,No family gatherings and No food on the stove.(In fact I've lived here three years in Feb)And I've haven't used the stove yet.(Now its fast  food or the microwave.)I still make a pot of coffee.But I only drink half a cup,the rest get poured down the sink..Your probably reading this and thinking this is down right depressing.But In fact Its not.I don't allow that in my life....I've learned to my make my  new  house a home.Decorate during the holidays.I spend time with friends from Church and I still have Family. Oh and Nuggett,who makes me laugh,The slightest hint that I'm going somewhere and she does circles as if she won the lottery,Runs and waits by the front door.

                               But Id give anything to have my family back,There's hope in knowing that someday we will reunite and walk on streets of gold in Heaven The awful thing is I keep having nightmares that I lose them all over again.Several times a week I dream of them,Then I wake up and have to shake it off.Pray for strength and go about my day.I know God has a plan for me.He wants us to be filled with joy and happiness.And I am......I try to laugh daily or make someones day a little happier.I am Blessed beyond words with a best friend that is here for me and makes me laugh so hard at times I cant control it.
                            I know a lot of you have had it tough and lost a lot as well,But we must move forward and never give up. I've learned to trust in God and he will never leave us nor forsake us.I am living proof,Some people might say Oh GOD is just your crutch,a way of getting through  a tragedy.If that's what it takes.Then so be it.Nov. 13th would of been Dads 78th birthday.I will honor it by writing a message to him on a balloon then releasing it and watch the wind carry it off into the deep blue sky.And I'll imagine and Angel will grab the balloon and hand deliver my message to my Dad.And then go about my day.Maybe even take Nug for a walk in the park.(he was her dog first (Mouse)..Ok I think I'm done for now,Not sure why I opened up so much,But feels good to share.Until next time my blogger buddies.
God Bless and Keep on keeping on


Comments

  1. wow, so sorry to read this.. thank you for your comment on my blog... I pray everything gets better for you. I noted your prior post from just 4 weeks ago and your sister being ill... again, wow, and so sorry... adding you to my blog roll... keep up the faith...!

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  2. I am sorry for your losses, John. It is neat that you do remember you will see your family again and it will be for eternity then. Also great reminder that God is for us not against us!

    betty

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  3. Dear John, I am so sorry for your enormous loss. It's odd, the way the mind works sometimes. I lost my dad when I was 15 due to a drunk driver, my mom when I was 3 months pregnant with Johnny's and my child. When Mom died I remember thinking "Now I am nobody's daughter." The years passed, many wonderful ones, then on Feb 22 of this year I lost my youngest sister, on Oct. 27, our son's birthday, my Johnny. I know about the nightmares, how heavy loneliness gets, how coffee, something you've always enjoyed, just doesn't taste quite the same any more. A house becomes a tomb when no laughter bounces off the walls and no loved ones are there to hug you or light up a room and our heart with a smile.
    You said you wondered why you posted such a personal post, but then realized why. Though my journey, our journeys are painful, it is comforting to have company, people to share with, who when they say"I know how you feel," really do. I tell my family and friends to always watch for those "SHINY" moments, those unexpected blessings...hugs from the LORD, that are especially welcomed midst the storms of our life. Just want you to know that this morning YOU are today's SHINY moment. Thank you so much for visiting MY JOHNNY blog. I invite you to check out this one too. I think (pray) it will uplift you like yours uplifted and comforted me. I'll be keeping you in my morning and evening prayers. MY other blog:
    http://barb-justfortoday.blogspot.com/

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  4. Hi John, Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment on my blog. You're right about life turning in a blink of an eye! That's all it took the day my sister passed away. The antibiotic she was on is called Bactrim. The medical examiner didn't link it to her death, they recorded her death as unexplained anaphylaxis.

    Your faith is not a crutch! Those who say that don't truly understand the meaning of faith. Wishing you a blessed Thanksgiving!!!

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